Busy busy bee

Hey there, been a very busy bee the last few days.

Not much of an update. AF is nowhere to be seen. I *think* I ovulated last week so Im guessing that I’ll see her soonish. But who really knows. My co-ordinator at VL asked me to go for a prog and e2 to see where we are but to be honset Im just not in the mood. I know AF will rock up one day so im just waiting, why waste the 200 bucks to say, yes she is on her way?

Last week I had a bit of a “what the fuck” moment. Asking myself why on earth Im doing this again (probably why Im not too bothered about AF). Another stressful cycle, meds, a 2ww…

Today is our wedding anniversary. 4 Years! Wow, how time has just flown. Yesterday we decided to celebrate by going away this weekend. I dont know where we are going but the fishing rod is packed 🙂 Its a suprise for me. Again i ask myself could we just up and leave with kids? I guess we probably wouldnt want to. Im looking forward to the weekend, and spending time with my gorgeous husband (and drinking copious amounts of wine!!)

I had to smile when I received this in my inbox this morning:

Does Having Children Make You Happier?

Social scientists have found almost no association with having children and happiness. Some studies have even reported significantly lower levels of life satisfaction amongst parents than people who haven’t had children.

The widespread belief that having children makes you happy is explained by an article in The Psychologist as ‘focusing illusion’. This is basically where one thinks about all the positives when imagining parenthood, imagining the milestones in our children’s lives will give us massive and long-lasting increases in happiness. We tend not to think about the everyday tasks associated with children, such as school problems, cooking and laundry. These tasks are more frequent than the happy events, and are likely to impact negatively on our day-to-day levels of happiness and life satisfaction.

Boy, I wish it was this easy! Then why the hell am I spending a friggen fortune on a DE cycle?

Another thing I have decided to do is do a course on metaphysics. Its something I have alsways wanted to explore and I think the time is now right.

What is Metaphysics?

To answer the question, Metaphysics is a branch of philosophy that explores what lies beneath the everyday, physical world around us. Metaphysics teaches us to look beyond our material world into the spiritual and energetic causes of all things. Metaphysics answers many deep questions, such as:

• What is my life purpose?
• What is consciousness and how does it develop?
• How do my thoughts create my reality?
• How can I transform the negative experiences in my life?
• What is spiritual intelligence and how can I apply it?
• What is soul and where do I go when I die?
• How can I tap into my own intuition and inner knowing?
• What is energy and how can I learn to direct it?

Through the deep study of metaphysics we begin to see our own lives from a new perspective. We notice the patterns, cycles and themes that we play out in everyday life. A framework of understanding and new tools help us to determine the cause of our behaviour and what we have to do differently so that we can experience the abundance we all deserve.  

Blah blah fishpaste

Nothing real going on at the moment, well there is alot going on in my head but Im not ready to blog yet about it. I go from ready to try DE to absolute denial about our situation to wanting to give it all up in a few seconds flat.

On Friday night we went out to see some big DJ perform in Jhb. It was ALOT of fun, we had a blast, dancing, drinking, having shooters being NORMAL. Woke up with a hangover on Sat morning but i was HAPPY. It was so great to just let go so to say.

Have my follow up appt with Dr V on Friday. I was so pissed after the BFN that I moved the appt to this week. Im kind of glad I did because we have at least had a bit of time to think of the other options (if any???????????) Scary.